5 June 2010

Papa's birthday

Today is my dad’s 79th birthday. He lives in a care home in Manila because he has Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s. His dementia has progressed enough in the last two years that he doesn’t remember who I am, which makes the decision to phone or not to phone him on his birthday a tricky one. I haven’t phoned him in a while, to be honest, because the last time I did, I introduced myself a few times to try and make him remember me. But he just handed the phone to the caregiver and walked away. I felt bad that I may have made him feel bad for not remembering me. So I haven’t called again, which also makes me feel bad because I feel that I should be phoning him. But if he doesn’t even remember me, does it really matter if I phone or not?

I remember my dad, the way he used to be. He was a difficult man to grow up with but I will always be grateful for the opportunities he allowed me to have. I have a pretty good life now because of his hard work and because he pushed us hard. So even when he can’t remember me now, I still wish him a happy birthday and a good year ahead.

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